Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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