i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
