This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize