I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
