Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
