Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
