That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
