I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
