Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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