You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
she pinky promised me she was 18
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize
