two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
