He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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