He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
