Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
