i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
The Olympian is in my bed
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