The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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