ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Shame - the story of my life.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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