at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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