did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
