on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
