Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
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