You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
