you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
