I want to stick my p in your. b.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
