My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
