I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize