stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
