she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
