The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
