I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
