i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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