We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Randomize
