NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
