Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Pants are for mortals
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Randomize
