Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Randomize
