He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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