do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I want to fling myself into the sun
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
