Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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