I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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