cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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