You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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