he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
