Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
