i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
