Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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