your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
