Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Randomize
