even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Randomize
