It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
