i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize
