I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
